Illinois Wedding Officiant
Illinois Wedding Officiant
Chicago Wedding Minister
Chicago Wedding Minister
Chicago Wedding Officiant
Chicago Wedding Officiant
Chicago Northshore Wedding Officiant
Chicago Northshore Wedding Officiant
Chicago North Shore Wedding Officiant
Chicago North Shore Wedding Officiant

Everyone cries at weddings!

I’m a crier.  I cry at weddings. I cry at parades. I cry at musical performances. I cry at my granddaaughters’ dance recitals. I have cried at Disney World and at Shamu while visiting Sea World. One time I even teared up biting into a cannoli.  I realize that I cry more than most people.  When I cry at things like parades and dance recitals, I’m not sad.  I’m not even crying because I’m happy, really, although I am.

It’s normal to be emotionally overwhelmed at a wedding.  Many people cry as the bride walks down the aisle or during the ceremony.  But what if you’re the bride, the groom or the father of the bride?  Should you cry?

Before a wedding, I ask the a couple if anyone is likely to cry.  If it’s the bride, I suggest the groom carry a cloth handkerchief in his pocket to either offer to her or to wipe her tears away if that’s something she would be comfortable with. Grooms, know your bride. If she’s likely to jump back and ask what you’re doing, hand her the hankie.  If there are two brides, they can either wrap a hankie around the bottom of a bouquet or have a maid of honor carry one.

If the groom is likely to cry, he should carry a handkerchief, obviously.  No one is going to say (or even think) that he is not acting manly.  Everyone will be touched.  I guarantee it.

The same goes for the father of the bride.  He is watching his little girl take one of the biggest steps of her life.  His heart is almost bursting with love and happiness as he ushers her into the arms of her beloved.  When the father of the bride cries, there is not a dry eye in the house.

But what if you absolutely do not want to cry?  Here are some methods that might work for you, while allowing you to remain in the moment:

  • Blink rapidly
  • Pinch the bridge of your nose. (This can be difficult if you are holding a bouquet with one hand a and a man’s arm with the other)
  • Pinch the webbed part between your thumb and forefinger. (Again, can be difficult with your hands full)
  • Squeeze your buttocks together. (Easier said than done while you’re walking, I realize)
  • Relax your facial muscles and try to breathe deeply
  • If you will be reading something, practice what you will be reading both standing up and out loud. Words behave differently in our mouths than in our heads and feel different when we’re sitting than when we’re standing. Also, the more familiar you are with your vows or reading or speech, the less likely the words are to overwhelm you

But my advice is to not be afraid to tear up.  It’s a wedding! Let yourself be carried away by the emotions of the event.  In addition to the ring bearer, have a tissue bearer carry a silver box, and cry!

Comments are closed.